Our family of 6 went to 3 weddings, a vacation, and a short term mission trip in the span of 12 weeks.
Did I mention that every trip was out of town?
2 of them were in Chattanooga, Tennessee (6 hours away). One trip was to Norse Lake (4 hours away). The other two expiditions were about 2 hours away.
The Weddings.
For both of the Chattanooga weddings, we were spoiled by family and treated to long weekends at a hotel. I have decided that staying in hotels is our family’s version of camping.
We stay up late. We swim. We sit by the fire at night. We eat around the clock. It is glorious.
And no one has to sleep on the ground or poop in a hole.
At the first wedding, I discovered liquid lipstick. For all of you who have known about liquid lipstick for over a decade, I apologize for just arriving at the party. I would also like to say-
Why didn’t you tell me?
Liquid lipstick is gold.
I don’t keep up with many beauty trends. I live with cows, chickens and sheep, I have no need for current makeup. I have been stuck in the same “beauty regimen” for as long as I can remember. It involves, homemade oil for cleaning & moisture (my recipe here), some basic mineral makeup, and mascara.
This summer I was introduced to 2 beauty products that have changed my life.
Liquid Lipstick & Highlighter
- Liquid Lipstick – this stuff is the bomb. It looks flawless. It doesn’t spread or run. AND It won’t come off, even if you want it too. Now that I am getting older (ahem) and have lovely cracks and lines around my mouth, lip products seem to want to travel. What the heck? Dear lipgloss, you have always stayed on my lips before, why now, do you want to be on my chin?
- Highlighter – If you don’t know what this is, go to your nearest ULTA and ask someone to put highlighter on your face. It will make you look 10 years younger. It doesn’t have much color, it just adds “highlights.” It adds shine. It gives you a youthful, dewy glow. I prefer the cream-based ones (I have really, really, [say ‘really’ 25 more times] dry skin) so cream blush, cream highlighter, and cream everything is what I use. OH, and I don’t actually shop at ULTA. I just like to go there so I can touch things and say, “Oooh, This is cute!” and then I go to TJ MAXX and buy all my makeup for $4.99.
Wedding #1:
My nephew married the love of his life. They were completely adorable and the wedding was very traditional.
- The wedding was indoors.
- The reception was indoors.
- There were air conditioning and no bugs.
- Which is a good thing because it was 200 degrees outside.
- The wedding ceremony and reception happened in the same building so that was extremely convenient. They said, “I do” and then we all walked 10 feet to the reception.
- They had doughnuts instead of cake because they don’t like cake.
- And the DJ was hilarious and made everyone get on the dance floor.
At the end of the wedding day, I received a text telling me that DH and I were on the DJ’s Facebook page. At one point in the evening, the DJ recruited all the married couples to dance and told us all to smooch. I didn’t know that I was being photographed, but it seems that I was.
Once I reached the DJ’s Facebook page I couldn’t find myself and DH on it.
After cropping the picture and zooming in, I realized I was the chick in the left-hand corner kissing the old guy with gray hair.
When did you first realize you were married to an old guy with gray hair?
I realized it approximately 8 weeks ago.
Wedding #2
The second wedding was for my first cousin. He is the cutest thing you have ever seen and I wish I had his eyelashes. His bride is equally as precious.
- Their wedding was in a church.
- The reception was outside in a beautiful white tent.
- It was 2000 degrees but that didn’t stop me from dancing ALL NIGHT LONG.
- They had a wedding cake for their wedding cake.
- There was a box filled with flip-flops so all of us ladies could ditch our heals and get down.
- We ate roast beef, mashed potatoes, green beans, and salad. Which was splendid.
- And the celebration was immense.
We stayed up way tooooooo late. We had a painful amount of fun. We slept for days attempting to recover from this wedding.
Wedding #3
The third wedding was another darling nephew. He and his wife are so stinkin’ cute together.
This was probably my personal favorite of the 3 weddings because the entire event took place outdoors and the reception was IN A BARN.
This speaks to my soul. I love traditional weddings in churches with fancy dresses. BUT the charm and rustic beauty of an old barn is my love language.
I loved that the sun was there to brighten up the ceremony and the stars came out for the reception.
- The wedding was outside by a lake.
- The reception was in a gorgeous white barn.
- There was a bonfire.
- The food was catered by a BBQ place and it was out of this world.
- The entire event was outdoors, but it was October and the weather was a perfect 71 degrees.
Another notable event that occurred at wedding #3 was the fishing trip.
My youngest child went down to the lake, found an old line with a hook attached to it. Tied it to a stick. And caught a fish. Yes – he went fishing at a wedding, and actually caught a fish. Who does that? Country kids.
After the 3 summer weddings, I think that everyone in our family is now hitched.
As far as the line-up goes, my children are now the oldest people in our family who are not yet married.
Which my 19-year-old pointed out.
He said, “I guess we’re next.”
The Lake
Some folks have money and go on fancy vacations to faraway places.
When you own your own business, much of your funds and investments are in that. At least, that is our case. We opened a pawnshop in LaGrange, KY in 2010 and have been broke ever since.
DH always tells people, “We don’t have any money, but we have a lot of stuff.”
Almost all of our ‘vacation time’ is spent visiting family, or going to simple places where we can drive, rent affordable accommodations, and take our food.
This summer we went to a Lake in Tennessee. It was so much fun!
Norris Lake is an amusement park as far as Lakes go. It all started with the house. We had to navigate 120 stairs every time we left the house (Yes. I counted), but it was worth the climb once you arrived and your breathing returned to normal.
The great news about having to climb 8000 steps each day is that it will prevent you from gaining weight on vacation. You will be sore, but you will not be fat.
There was a floating dock in the back of our rental home and it was such a fun surprise.
There was a slide, a sun deck, a jumping platform, and a floating trampoline.
No, it was not a three-person kayak. It was a one-man kayak, but they somehow managed to get three teenagers onto it without capsizing.
Me and my 12-year-old son (I’m the one in the cowboy hat)
We went tubing, hiking, fishing, and water skiing (I hadn’t skied in 25 years. I am happy to announce that I can still do it).
The highlight of the trip was the day we rented a pontoon boat.
Pontoon Day was the day I almost died.
We rented a pontoon boat to tour the lake. Our first stop was to the gas station/ convenience store to get a map and ask the locals where we should boat. The gas station attendant was a highschool boy working at the boat stop for his summer job. He took one look at the 7 teenagers aboard our party barge and decided he should try to kill the adults.
We promptly found out that this lake had a ‘jumping bridge,’ a rope swing, and climbing rocks.
What even?
I wish I had some good pictures of these projects because you won’t believe me when I say they were terrifying. The photography problem with all these absurd adventures is that they happen in lots of water. I don’t have a waterproof camera or phone, so I have no pics of the shenanigans. Y’all are going to have to take my word for it.
The swing
Our first stop on death row was the swing.
The swing was shady, at best. There was a rope. It was tied so high in a tree I suppose they used a helicopter to get it up there. The rope had several, haunting pieces of different ropes tied and knotted together. Evidence that the rope had indeed broken in the past and been repaired. This didn’t help my confidence in the venture.
The hillside was steep and littered with giant rocks. The problem was, you had to scale the mudwall, rocks and go deep into the woods, avoiding the poison ivy, to reach the proposed launch location. This was where you were allegedly supposed to catapult your unwilling body into the great unknown.
The first half of the rope swing was through the woods and over the rocks. It was only the last 30 feet of the swing that happened over the safety of the water.
This is the problem. Not the outswing over the lake. Not the splash into the water. It was the 20 foot trip down the woodline and over the rocks that was alarming.
Wait, what? I need a test run. I need a practice session that doesn’t involve rocks. I need to know if I can hang onto this rope WITH ONLY MY HANDS for the entirety of the trip. I need to know if my butt is going to stay elevated above ground level.
By the way, there was no way to test this until you were actually in motion attempting to sustain yourself by your hands for 50 feet.
What if my hands slip?
What if the rope breaks?
What if I don’t have the upper body strength to hold myself up for the entire trip?
How much do I weigh?
How much do I weigh when flying downhill over rocks into a lake?
What’s the added force of gravity?
It’s physics.
I am going to die from physics.
Why do humans want to hurt themselves?
Lord, help us all.
I should have stayed in the boat.
And another thing… once you managed to spider-man yourself up the mud wall, there was no way down EXCEPT the sketchy rope.
I was forced to swing against my will. I said a prayer beforehand because I was certain I was going to die.
I didn’t die.
Adrenalin. I credit adrenalin for the fact that I was able to hang on until reaching the water. Because I couldn’t do a pull up if my life depended on it.
In addition to the adrenalin, there was also the fact that I was a complete weenie and didn’t start at the top. I began my launch about halfway between the proposed dispatch site and the lake. My strategy involved being closer to the water, so when the rope snapped (or my arms failed me) I would only break a hip instead of die.
The rocks.
The next item on the violent docket was “the rocks.” The guy at the gas station made a star on our map and told us there were ‘jumping rocks’ that we could boat to and the kids would have a lot of fun.
Lies.
For the love of everything. Can’t we just cruise around the lake like normal people? I was vacationing with a bunch of daredevils and after we barely survived the rope swing from hell, we headed to the rocks.
At this point in the vacation we had been jumping off a 15-foot sundeck in our backyard daily, so I thought, “How much higher can the jumping rocks be?”
Stupid question.
Much higher.
Much, much higher.
These were not “rocks.” We do not have “rocks” like this in Kentucky.
We call them “cliffs.”
Ugh. Once again I felt the need to participate.
You know that metaphor, “If all your friends were jumping off a cliff, would you do it?”
Yes. Yes I would. And I did.
Let’s hear it for peer pressure.
Part of me was embracing the Evil Kneivel spirit of the week. Another part of me wanted to see if I could do it. But the rational part of me was screaming that I should stay in the boat – stop risking my life in the name of entertainment- and go drink something fruity.
But, since everyone else was doing it…
I was one of the first out of the pontoon and in the lake and I swam to the wall without hesitation. My goal was to get the suicidal activities over with. Thankfully, there was a rope ladder of sorts tied to the wall to help those of us who don’t rock climb [in wet bathing suits with no gear].
Up I went.
One of the most motivating factors was the 5-year-old girl who was jumping off the wall cliff and giggling like it was nothing.
If she could do it, I could.
I hoisted myself up the wall and threw my body off the top rock. I didn’t hesitate. I didn’t study the height. I didn’t look down. I didn’t take off my lifevest. I knew if I studied the situation I would need to spend the next hour psyching myself up into going through with the adventure.
My thoughts on jumping off a cliff into a lake?
It’s painful.
Don’t do it.
I swam back to the boat, removed my life preserver and called it a vacation. The rest of the week was spent doing things that don’t end in death, like hiking, playing cards, and floating in innertubes.
In addition to all the jumping, swinging, sliding, tubing, skiing, and hiking, we ate, we laughed and we made memories.
This was one of our best family vacations we have ever had. I think all the adventures made it really fun for the kids (and unforgettable for the grown-ups).
The Mission Trip.
As if we didn’t have enough going on this summer, we added a mission trip into the mix.
We went on a short term mission trip to Barren Heights and it was such a blessing. This was our second time serving there.
Barren Heights serves families with children who have disabilities. It is such a wonderful place. The visiting families stay in beautiful log cabins where they can relax. Those of us serving are there to cook, clean, take care of the children and love on the families.
I love the concept and it is truly a gift to everyone. Many of the families who come to stay at Barren Heights are in such difficult situations. There was one family who had two children who were non-verbal. They were runners (don’t turn your back) and one was a biter (yes, I got bit).
When you are unable to communicate, I suppose biting is a way to express one’s dissatisfaction with the situation.
Sorry dude, it’s time for dinner, no you can’t go play in the splash pad right now – and “chomp.” I had a bruise on my arm for 2 weeks, and I don’t bruise. Thankfully, he didn’t break the skin or we would have been in an emergency room. Did you know that if there is a human bite that breaks the skin it is an automatic hospital visit?
I didn’t.
Humans are gross.
I was fine. I was embarrassed that I didn’t get out of the way before he got me, but physically, I was fine.
Unfortunately, some of the visiting families have children with such extreme disabilities that they are literally confined to their homes.
It is so wonderful that Barren Heights provides a place where these people can come. They know that their children are safe and will be loved. The buildings and equipment were all built with disabilities in mind so they are fully equipped. Many families come back to Barren Heights after their first visit because it is such a loving, safe environment.
If you are going there to serve, don’t expect the red carpet. You are there to work and it is not a vacation. I love this. I think it is good for us to “do without” every now and then. We are all so spoiled in our American lives.
Those of us serving are provided a shed to sleep in. This is one of those cute barn things they sell in the parking lot at Home Depot. There is a floor and bunks inside but no bathroom.
If you need to brush your teeth or relieve yourself, you can head to the main lodge.
And mission trips are not about sleep.
Plan to rise early (especially if DH is in your shed). He had us all up and moving by 6 am every day.
No, you won’t need books or anything else to help you fall asleep in the evening. At lights out, you will be so exhausted from chasing children all day you will be asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.
I love that my children have the chance to serve others. It is good for them to be around other children different from them.
All in all, I call it a successful summer. We have never been so busy or traveled so much in our lives. But it sure was fun.
XO,
Candi
